Turn the stove to high heat now. Bring the water to a rolling boil. This will start the cooking process quickly.

Turn off the heat and cover the pot. Let the eggs sit for twelve minutes. This makes the yolks perfectly yellow and firm.

Move the eggs to a bowl of ice water. Let them cool down for at least five minutes. This makes the shells much easier to peel.

Peel the eggs and place them in a bowl. Use your fork to mash them into pieces. Keep some chunks for a better mouthfeel and look.

Add the mayonnaise, mustard, and relish to the bowl. Stir in the chopped celery and green onions now. Mix everything until the salad is very creamy.

Sprinkle in your salt and pepper to taste. Give it one final stir to distribute the spices. Top the bowl with a dusting of red paprika.